What do you call a dumb friend? Sam.

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Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

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How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

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What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

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How many vikings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Probably just one, though I'd imagine it hard to teach someone from the 9th century C.E. how to, let alone explain electricity.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Living in Africa.

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Matt is a Duster!

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

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why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

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whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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Once upon a time a was born

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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