If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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are you saying pam, or pan?

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What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

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What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot, racist.

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It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

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Wow! I've seen this joke before!

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What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

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How the hell do you know? What are you Nero? You are completely right! I was going to say I got no blue tie, but then I forgot you often call ribbons for ties... How? Should I be scared? I am not, no wonder you never felt human... I am shocked, I cant think straight I am confused and... Sorry Nero, Goodnight, if nothing else, you are no demon, but rather an angel, sweet dreams love. The solvemedia says the bible, this is freaky, my mind is numb.

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There is a asian, mexican and a blonde boy at school. Every day they each get the same food for lunch. The asian always got noodles. The mexican a taco. the blonde boy got pb and j. They decide if they get this lunch again, they will jump off a cliff. The next day they get the same lunch and jump off a cliff. At their funeral the asian mom says " if i had known, i would have made her sushi." the mexican mom says " i would have made her a burrito." The blonde's dad say "hey don't look at me, he makes his own lunch."

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A thief stole a calendar. Later, feeling guilty, he returned it to its owner, admitted his misconduct, and went to a local minimart to purchase his own.

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yo Mama so stupid a robber stole her t.v and she ran after him yelling, YOU FORGOT THE REMOTE!

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

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What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

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This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

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Holy mother moley! Britain just brexited! Now there's no more Britain. Britain is all gone.

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!!!! lolooloL!OL!olO!LO!Lo!l!LO!L!O11P!lOL!oO!l

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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