What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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How do you get four gay men on one stool? You get three more stools.

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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what do you call a man with one leg? whatever his name is.

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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your momma is so fat she has diabetes

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What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

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knock knock who's there? faith

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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DO U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD BIRD BIRD, BIRD IS THE WORD? DON'T U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? EVERYOBODY KNOWS THAT THE BIRD IS THE WORD! Oh, no i did not know that the bird was the word.

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What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

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What is Ron afraid of? Spiders!

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

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What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

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Knock knock I'M IN THE BATHROOM !!

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops