- Anti Joke

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Oh, I thought you could tell me. I will ask someone else. See you later.

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

A miserable man committed suicide.

A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

This is my favorite antijoke.

hashtags suck balls

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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