Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

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What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

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A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

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The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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Camerons hair is Curly..

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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What did the women get after valentines day? An abortion.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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If you search "fat black man" on Google, you will find many reesults about black people who happen to be chronicly obese.

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Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

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A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

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So there is a muslum, then he flew a plane into a building and died a sudden death. But he was wearing a helmet.

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Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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