Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

thumb_up thumb_down +26

CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops