knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

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What has 8 legs and makes women scream? .....Gang rape.

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

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the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

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What do you call a dog with no legs Nothing it won't come

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What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

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Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

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Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

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Whats better then a guard llama two Guard llamas

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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