Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

Knock knock... Home invasion

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

A bunch of teens were egging the house of their science teacher for giving them homework over break. They got caught by their teacher's ex-husband and he told them, "She broke up with me for telling her she was being too hard on her students. So, my friends, egg on!!!!!"

Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

95556

What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

What's the best anti-pest control of all time???? The Holocaust.

How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...