Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

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Why did Sally cry at the wedding? somebody shot her future husband.

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

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your mama's so fat... that's it

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

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What does Jason say when he rages on cod ? I hope your family gets slaughtered in front of him ..

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What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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antonio has a penis head.lol

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It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

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What's the difference between Little Billy and Ice Cream? People like Ice Cream.

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What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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Q: Why couldn't the skeleton go to the party A: He had a boner

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

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One day there was a princess born in the jungle. The story goes, that she'd be saved by a grand champion - a Hero. So the day came that she fell in love. After a few magical years, they broke up and she realized that fairy tales are for little girls.

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Want to hear a joke? I hope not because I don't know any.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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