thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

How do you stop an aboriginal from drowning? Take your foot off his head...

Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

did you know that zach is the coolest person ever? no? well now you know

Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

The sword that kills, the sword that gives life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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