I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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women rights

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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