What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have Somthing To tell you F*** You

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Interrupting Doctor Interru--- You Have Cancer...

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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Anyone can post anything.

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How do you kill batman? you stab him through the heart

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Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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What does God say when a balck person is person is borned? "Another burnt one"

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Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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