What separates man from animal? Divorce.

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

guess what? bannanas

Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

What happened to the Jewish child that used to live life like a normal kid? Him and his family were taken to a ditch and shot to death. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be. He could not be. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. He's either in great danger or has a psychological disorder.

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

your momma is so fat she has diabetes

Whats green and has wings? grass, I lied about the wings.

Poop

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

A blonde walks into a bar. That's it.

What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

What's the difference between a educated black man & a educated white man? One's black, One's white

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...