knock knock who's there ?

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

-Why did the chicken cross the road? '' I dont know '' -Because it would cross the road and over to you. -Knock knock? '' Who's there?'' - CHICKEN!!!!!!!

Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

whats worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree? one baby nailed to ten trees.

Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? a broken head.

What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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