Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did one lion say to the other lion? Nothing. There was no other lion. This particular lion had horrible social anxiety so he spent most of his time alone, eating buffalo poop and playing World of Warcraft thus further alienating himself from the other lions. He was a very lonely lion.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock Who's There? Steve Steve who? Your friend Steve, you called and told me to come over. Oh, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Faithful men.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? A friendly individual who cares nothing about racial differences and instead judges people based on character.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops