What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

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What is a dyslexic mathematician's favourite song? Angels. [L]

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? Because she came from a very poor family and could not afford a decent education

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So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

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Your're racist.

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What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

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What do you call a black man standing on a podium? Slave trade

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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