- Anti Joke

Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

Roses are red Im adopted

What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

What do you call a leper in a spa bath? Say excuse me Sir (or Madam), I notice you have leprosy, did you know that it is treatable? MDT for multibacillary leprosy consists of rifampicin, dapsone, and clofazimine taken over 12 months. Dosages adjusted appropriately for children and adults are available in all primary health centres in the form of blister packages.[17] Single dose MDT for single lesion leprosy consists of rifampicin, ofloxacin, and minocycline. The move toward single-dose treatment strategies has reduced the prevalence of disease in some regions, since prevalence is dependent on duration of treatment. World Leprosy Day was created to draw awareness to leprosy and its sufferers

What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? DAM!

why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his village.

What did the two best friends do before the asteroid hit the Earth? They hugged each other goodbye.

Your mama is so white she helped pay for your education because she wants you to have the best opportunities in life.

What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

Tim likes girls

Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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