i have a story to tell u!!! oh s*** i forgot!

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"Knock knock..." "come in"

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Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

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Two attractive women were getting ready to visit the gym. On the way there, they stopped at a local sports store to purchase some new shorts, and they got it at a good discount price

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

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Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What did Helen Keller say when she was hit by a bus? . : ; : . : . :

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

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A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

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What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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every cloud has a silver lining

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A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

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How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops