How do you make a Flamingo cry? Hit it with a sledgehammer.

How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

autistic kids rock

One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Phil.

Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...