what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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your mom is so fat she is at high risk of a future heart attack and should be taken to a cardiologist

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What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

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A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

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what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

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Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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AIDS

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Knock knock ... Knock knock ... Little did the man knocking at the door know that the kid was told not to answer the door when he was home alone, so the kid was hiding

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TOFFEES HEAD LYING IN THE GRASS

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Did you hear about the Irish man that accidently killed himself,he farted in the bath & drowned trying to smell it

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Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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WHAT HAS MAN BOOBS THE SIXE OF JUPITER BOMBER NEVILLE

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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