Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

So, I walk into a bar and say "Why do you call this place a bar, I don't see any bars in here!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

Your mom is so fat, she had a heart attack and died. It was very sad and she will be missed.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

What did the Nazi Death Camp Guard say to the escaping prisoner? - Nothing. He shot him in his face.

What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

Take part of what?

You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

Q: What happens when two feminists try to chanbe a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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