Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

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Wanna hear a joke? Fifa price ranges.....:(

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whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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