Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

Did you hear the joke about the pencil? Nevermind it was pointless.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

will you like this joke my sources say no

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

Indians

What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

A blode walks into a bar, She gets her hair dyed brown and is later presumed smarter due to a the genral public being steriotipical.

What is better than life? Nothing.

What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...