Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

what makes a knight in shining armor a knight in shining armor? he has to have armor and be a knight.

Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

Two guys are walking on a bridge. One has long hair. The other does not care.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

The First National Tree Bank just closed down. Don't worry it started a brand new branch.

Why did Sally ask for ketchup? She wanted to use it on her french fries.

Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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