Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

Why did the black man walk into the white house? Cause he lives there because he is our president

Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? A fat kid sitting on you

The sword that kills, the sword that gives life.

Some say Helen Keller can't write a good book. You know what she said? Nothing.

roses are red hula is hula when i walk in cass i see a big tula

Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

What do you call a Black man sweeping the floor? A janitor.

What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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