A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

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A man walked into a bar, and clutched his stomach in pain as it was a steel bar and it hurts when you walk right into a steel bar.

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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what did joe eat for breakfast? he didn't eat, joe is schizophrenic steve's best friend

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

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Haha, I get it..

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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