If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

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Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his village.

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Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

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Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

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What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

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What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

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I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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What do you call a Mexican hot dog? Lunch.

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Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

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On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

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read this sentence again.

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silver bullet?

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Yo Mama just died.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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why do jews like weed? A) because they are used to being baked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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