What did the bird say to the fence? Chirp.

What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

Why did the fish look like a human? Because it was a person, drowning.

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

You're so sweet I have diabetes

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

Q: How do you keep a carnival fish for more than a week? A: Place it in formaldehyde when you get home

Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

The t rex said to the textbook ............. Im not going to read you

Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in face! Why didn't she get back up? Because she didn't have any friends!

Why did the CEO step down? Because he was very ill and could no longer meet his duties and expectations as Pear’s CEO.

A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

13 =B you just learned something

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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