Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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how does wasabi stay open during summer because tiffany is a nice person

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A guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "whered you get the pig?" The guy says, "It's not a pig its a parrot." The bartender says, "i was talking to the parrot."

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

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A man walks into an illegal brothel. He is a cop. He takes them back to the police station and questions them in a completely asexual manner.

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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Ring around the rosy. A pocket full of posies. Ashes. Ashes. I just set a dead baby on fire.

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TOP KEK

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

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Q: are you gay? A: maybe

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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