So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

Why did the Mexican fail his english test? Because he had studied for an inadequate amount of time and proceeded to fornicate with many women, also preventing him from sleeping for the advised 7-8 hours a night.

How many trees does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trees are incapable of screwing light bulbs

What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being chased by other cannibal chickens.

why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

What did Dmitri say to all his friends? Nothing he has no friends

How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

Why couldn't Jimmy go bowling with the rest of his friends? His parents shot him.

What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

Anti - Jokes. com

Why can't John hear what Muhammad says? John is deaf.

your mom is so fat that she should probably try a deit in the neer future.

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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