What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Knock Knock. There was no answer.

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

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L.A Clippers 2000-2012 season!!!!

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

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What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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wat does T.J.C.S. Mean? leave an comment to answer

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what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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