A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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How do you stop an aboriginal from drowning? Take your foot off his head...

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

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Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

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trump and hillary are both stranded on an island, who survives? america

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What is better than a Beer? Two Beers.

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Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

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You know those people that learned the true name of God, as God asked kindly... ...Well you know God can be nice sometimes but he actually COMMANDED they keep his name secret forever? They became the first people known as Jehova`s witnesses... JEHOVAH<<< SECRET NAME ANYBODY? So much for keeping his secret name guys! They claim that only a few thousand humans will ascend to heaven, in other words all of the JEHOVA`s witnesses... All two billions of them or something... For keeping his name (Cough JEHOVAH) secret. SUCCESS!

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What's tall black and has curly hair? A black guy

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I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

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gabe sucks 8-------------------D~

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Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

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Suicide is never the answer. Unless you ask me what I contemplated after I found out that my family was killed in a horrific traffic accident.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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