An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

Whats black and white and red all over? A dead zebra

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

What did god say when a black person was born? Damn I burnt one

Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

a morman walks into a bar, he buys a 7up.

Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

roses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

Why did the girl run over the road? Her buttons rolled to the other side! (From a book called... Al-capone does my shirts) (Natilie)

What did the apple say to the other apple? Nothing, apples are fruits and cannot talk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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