Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

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What's big, purple, and smells like children? Barney

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What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

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why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

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All of these jokes are about white people

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Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

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Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

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What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

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Whats the difference between a Cadillac and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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Mum makes $97 per hour working online? Offline I can see , but online, mmm pull the other one, it plays lossless codecs

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How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

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Q:Why is the WMBA so unsuccessful? A:Barely anyone watches it

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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Your mamas so fat, she was self-conscious about her weight and became an antisocial vegetable.

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a horse walks into an abandoned lighthouse , the lighthouse keeper is angered by this and ushers the horse to leave but the horse gets startled and kicks the mans bookshelf over before galloping away

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Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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