Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

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Three men are stranded in a small rowboat. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. It became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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You know what they say... Once you go black you...have gone down the road of diversity and it's impossible to back track and return to ones previous misconceptions.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (smell my poo)

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

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Knock Knock Who is there? Orange Orange who? Orange-Banana

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I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

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What did the Scientist say after he created Frankenstein? - I just created Frankenstein.

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A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

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Knock, knock Who's there? The electrician And about bloody time too, you'd better come in.

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What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Why did the girl miss her date? She got killed.

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

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What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

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What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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