How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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ugvvvvvv

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

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what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

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Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

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9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

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Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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When there's something strange in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call? The Police. There's something strange in your neighborhood.

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Why was the man burying his child? because in france, fishing is only allowed 3 times a day

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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why did the man fall off his unicycle? because he was dead

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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