Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

What did one dolphin say to the other after watching a banana dance with an afro. My pancreas was replaced with a mango.

Wanna here a funny joke... Trevor michael dyess's social life.

What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

Why are white people white? I don't know

What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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