Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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Why should you be scared when a black man asks you, "What are looking at?" Because if he is over the age of 18, he should know better than to end a sentence with a preposition, unless of course, he never had an education, in which case... you should probably run for your life.

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what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

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Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

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Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

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knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

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Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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