So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" It proceeds to then crap on the floor and walk out,because its a horse.

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What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

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Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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what is yellow and burns? -a fire

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Colin Come in

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what did the orange say to the apple? hi

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Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

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what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

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Why did Sally fall out of the tree? Because She had no arms or legs... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Knock-Knock? Who's There? Not Sally

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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FUCK YOU

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

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A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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