Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

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What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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Dad always said that laughter was the best medicine. Maybe that's why he died of tuberculosis.

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

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Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

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What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

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It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

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A man finds a magic lamp and rubs it. A genie appears and says that he will grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish for a duck". POOF! He got a duck. Then he says "I wish for a penguin". POOF! A penguin magically appears. He thought long and hard for his 3rd wish. Then he said "I wish I had a turtle" POOF! Suddenly out of nowhere the genie disappears. The man looked inside the magic lamp and saw a small turtle. The end.

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A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

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What is the best joke ever? 1D

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

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Justin Bieber

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops