Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

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What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

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Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

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Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

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Dad always said that laughter was the best medicine. Maybe that's why he died of tuberculosis.

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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Justin Bieber

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Your Mamma So Fat The Old Thing That Block's Her From Destroying Kid's Party's Is The Front Door

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 had paranoia.

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

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What is the best joke ever? 1D

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops