What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

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what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this duck and it makes me wana quack like what the f**k is THAT!

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the house. knock knock. who's there? the chicken!

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

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So Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station....

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

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What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

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DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

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Why did an asian lawyer commit suicide? Because his wife left him and he hated his miserable life.

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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what did the cashier do when a Mexican robbed the store? call the police

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops