What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

thumb_up thumb_down -35

what do you call a tall black man with big ears? orangatang

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

thumb_up thumb_down -35

It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down -35

what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why was the man sad? His brother died.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Roses are red Heres something new Violets are violet not fucking blue

thumb_up thumb_down -35

why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What do you say to the woman who just got raped? Nothing you just raped her

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

thumb_up thumb_down -37

so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops