Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

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Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

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What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

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who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

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Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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What is black and burns really well? charcoal.

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? AIDs then he got mugged on the way home from the hospital

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A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

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What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

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So I'm balls deep in this 9 year old...

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A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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An asian and a black guy walked into a bar. An ambulance rushed to their aid as they were in great pain and had a slight chance of becoming paraplegic.

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how did the guy in the wheelchair cross the road he didnt he got dragged down the street cause his chair was hooked to the bus

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why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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