What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

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Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

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Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

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You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

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Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

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Never mail in your wished to a genie, he may be dyslexic.

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What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

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the bible

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were you expecting a joke

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what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

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What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

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why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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