Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Yo Mama's so fat Everyone is very concerned for her Health.

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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Joke- Blah Blah Blah, punch line -LOL -Shut the hell up

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Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

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What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

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Are we in Tennessee? Because I recently saw on the side of the road that it was 10 miles to Memphis.

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A black child gives away his piece of fried chicken. He is allergic, and eats some watermelon instead.

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Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

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- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Democracy.

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homosexual rights to marriage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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