A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

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Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

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Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

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What has two legs? Half a cat

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What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

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Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

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What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

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Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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- I got kicked out of the library today. - why? - because I put the women's rights book in the fiction section

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops