What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

Potassium? K.

Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

Death by kayak

what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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