Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have cancer Nutella on muffin

Roses are Red Violets are Blue No they're not They're purple

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

Rebecca Black. That's it. That's the joke.

whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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