Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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Why'd the bird in Ohio fall out of its nest? There was a squirrel that was eaten by a large eagle. The eagle then flew to Ohio and died. Then, a large dog grabbed the Eagles corpse and brought it to his owner. The owner then decided to have it for dinner. Inside the eagle, he found the squirrels bones. He put the bones in a catapult, and sent them flying. The bones hit a car and the car slipped off the road and into a river. Then, a whale put the car on its back and swam to the shore. At the shore, the whale got stranded and sadly died. Crabs surrounded the whale and ate it. One crab then ran away and up a tree. It found a stapler and a rubber dinosaur mask and gave it to a chipmunk. The chipmunk climbed up the tree, stapled nuts into the birds eyes and stapled the rubber dinosaur mask to its face, the bird got scared, and then all of the sudden the chipmunk stapled itself to the birds back. The birds family then came and shoved the two out of the tree because they hated chipmunks, and their son Timmy the bird was a disappointment. The bird and the chipmunk fell and died. That is why the bird fell.

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Finally, lets take the fight two the streets shall we, no I am not asking, asking is for pussies: YOU VIOLATED AND KILLED MY FATHER! YES YES WHAT IS IT WITH YOU WOMEN ANYWAYS I VIOLATED YOUR MOTHER TOO, BUT YOU DON`T HEAR HER WHINING ABOUT IT! In fact tell her to stop her sending me nude shots, I prefer it when she sends me those she takes of you in your sleep... Your friendly Neighborhood R*pist Moral Man:The day Moral Man graced your village was the worst day of your life, for me it was fathers day! Literally, do you really think I killed your father? I would never comitt suicide! Now, let us celebrate our reunion with some... "Moral WINcest" Barlog: Yes we would like to see the tapes you made for me banging her mother. two Super Turbo edition hours later: YEEEEEEEEEEES! YEEEEEEEEEEEES!

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

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What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

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what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Potassium? K.

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There's an african american, a latino, and an asian man riding in the car, whos driving? Obciously one of the three

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Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

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Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

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Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

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what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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