welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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Roses are red Violets are T I T S I like T I T S T I T S

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Knock knock who's there?... a stupid punchline because the door is imaginary and I am just wasting your time telling a knock knock joke

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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Have You Ever Seen Stevie Wonder's New House? No.. Neither Has He.

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

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Gullible is not in the dictionary Yes it is

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What's black and white and red all over? A domestically abused bi-racial woman.

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Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

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It is true that Trump will make America great again.

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

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What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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You know what they say about priests with big rosaries? I don't know, it's in Latin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops