how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

A man is in the desert and he finds a lamp, he rubs the lamp and out comes a genie! The genie says "I can grant your three wishes, for releasing me from the lamp" The man says "I wish I didn't have AIDS".

Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

Children + my basement + my finger = yes

Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

WHo owns a white van? JOSH!!

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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