What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

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What did the man say before he got stabbed? What are you going to do, stab me?

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

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hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

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Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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Corn Muffins

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What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

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what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

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Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

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I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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